Don't say a word, I'm okay with the quiet.

I am done with the week of mayhem.
*throws confetti*

I must have been really tired and sleep-deprived, I slept from 4:30PM until 9.

I know. I sleep like a log. Be champions!


I was going to sleep again at 11:30. Nicely tucked in bed, I shut my eyes tight.

But some inconsiderate shit head spoilt it all. He kept honking for over an hour and a half. I have no freaking idea why he did it but it was just plain rude.

It's fucking midnight, sane people are trying to sleep. For once I decided to join the society of the sane by sleeping early, but look what you did.

You've relegated me to community of the undead.

He's stopped already, thankfully, but I can't go back to sleep now because I can't fall asleep with a horribly angry head.

*breathes deeply*


Okay. Let me bore you with random conversations.
Random conversation 01: the best friends in McDonalds'.
"So you agree to Theobroma Tuesday?"
"Theo Walcott?"
"WTF"
"THEOBROMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!"
"Oh, that"
"Yes, that"
"So you're up for it?"
"Yes"
"Awesome"
"So alright, what's the plan?"
"Hmm...Plan one: eat at Fish and Co. Two: eat at Theobroma. Three: buy the shoes with the snake skin print (if it's still there) at Novo. Four: get album. Five: insert earplugs"
"Huh? Earplugs? What for?"
"Isn't it obvious?"
"What is?"
"We're getting earplugs for ourselves because we know you will start squealing once you exit Rock Corner with that CD in your hands"
"We want to take precautionary measures to prevent ourselves from going deaf due to incessant fangirly screams"
"HEY!"
*smacks arms*
"True facts, baby"

Random conversation 02: the mother.
"I went to eat in KFC earlier"
"Yerr...so unhealthy. I expected better from you"
"It was one of those days-lah I felt like eating something from KFC!"
"Anyway, back to what I was saying earlier. While I was eating, they played Light On"
"Did you think of me or not?"
"Of course I did!"
"Awwww! You love me! I love you too!"
"I was thinking about how you'd spazz out and start singing or screaming hearing it"


Seriously, do I squeal/scream really bad?

Anyway, I am seriously in love with the drummer boy and his hair. WTF ARE YOU SO PRETTY?



Sudah Tuesday ke belum?
*gets twitchy*

When you get what you want, but not what you need.

I need a drink.
I need a break.

I need a statistics nerd to help me differentiate the many statistical tests available out there.

I need some distraction
oh beautiful release
memory seeps from my veins
let me be empty and weightless
and maybe I'll find some peace tonight

Angel - Sarah McLachlan.



Okay, I've got my distraction already.

I think I better go find some peace in my sleep.
It's going to be a long Tuesday.


What a shocker, Roxanne. To think that I assumed your least favourite day was Saturday.
*rolls eyes*

OFF TO YOUR BED!
*kicks*

I hope you don't mind, that I put down in words how I feel.

I love to sleep. You know that.

I also love my room. If ever my room is not in the condition it's supposed to be (clean), I would refuse to sleep in it and start cleaning it at really odd hours of the day. Otherwise I will call myself a failure.

The problem that has been bugging me for the last 2 months is that my room is the room with the balcony. That is where we hang our clothes. People would come in and out of my room to hang their clothes and whatnots.

It used to be just my mother who would come in my room and hang clothes.

Now it's my sister-in-law.

My brother also comes in occasionally, to borrow my laptop.

My dad would come in to see if I was awake or asleep, so that he knows whether or not he should turn the modem off.

In the process, he would lock me in my own room.

Sometimes, my mother locks me in too.

So does my brother.

When I find myself locked in, I knock (more like banging in a violent fit of rage) on my door in hopes of it breaking it down.

Sometimes, if I wake up at an ungodly hour, say at 4 in the morning, I know my mother would be up and I'd call her and say "Hello, someone locked me in and I can't get out. Come up and open the door for me, please".

Sometimes, I think she does it on purpose. It's her way of saying "Stay in there. Stay out of trouble", I think.

Crafty mother.

Sometimes, it's the weekend or it's a day I don't have class/anything to do and all I feel like doing is sleeping just a few hours more.

Then my mother comes in to hang the clothes and after doing all that, she will sit at the edge of the bed and wakes me up to tell me random stories of something my father said or what she saw on the idiot box.

Sometimes I am fast asleep and she tells me to move a little because she wants to sit on the edge of my bed to fold clothes.

I keep hearing David Archuleta's Crush on the radio every single hour that I am awake, it's insane.

I know-lah I have like this SUPER MASSIVE crush on all the boys in the band (Shut up. Don't judge me, okay), but really, playing Crush to mark that is a little too much, don't you think?

I hate interrupted sleep.

I hate having eyebags.

I hate people coming in and out of my room.

I am beginning to hate that song.

I hate the fact I can't go back to sleep now.

This is the time of my life.

This post shall be updated when someone else decides to be generous with gifts.

Excuse my cheesy title. My 21st was indeed the time of my life.

So what happened?
My best friend from secondary school called me up at midnight and lamented about the fact she has to wait until December to turn legal. It was incredibly nice of her to call me up from the library of her university since she was studying for my finals, she never fails to call me up at midnight on my birthday. We had a falling out for about a year in 2005 and I'm eternally thankful that we're back on good terms again.

After that, my 17 years and her cousin called me up and made an awful rendition of Light On and Crush, they were mucking up the lyrics! I couldn't help but laugh really loudly, which resulted in myself getting a slap from my mother for being too loud. Yeah, I got slapped by my mother a few minutes into my moments of being 21. Let's not talk about that because it makes the three of us feel horribly awkward. Thank you nonetheless, for being there and making me laugh to prevent the tears from rolling down and telling me what to do when it did and my pressure dropped.

Anyways, the whole morning of my birthday, I refused to see anyone. I made a dash to the bathroom, took a shower and headed back into my room. and stayed in there for what seemed like forever. I was bitter, okay. My birthdays in the past have never been outstanding, I always end up being miserable and grumpy. I came down only when everyone was ready to head out to visit my relatives. That was at 1:24PM, the time I was born, and my dad wishes me at only this time and not earlier or later than that. He wished me and the rest followed. I don't think I shook hands with my mother because I was very upset.

The first place we went to was my Mak Ngah and Mak Su's place. I have been craving for her chicken rendang (that's where my mother got her recipe from) and her kuah kacang. By far, the best kuah kacang ever. It so happens my Mak Su and I share the same birthday. We had fun teasing my Mak Ngah. Poor auntie. Haha. By this time, I felt better. Grumpy baby walrus was nowhere to be seen.

Then we headed out to my Mak Andak's house. We had a good laugh too.

After that, we went over to an old family friend's house. I don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing she forgot my birthday. Every year, she used to give RM100 in the birthday card she posted and that stopped for a while, and when my brother got married, she gave me RM100 too. One thing about this auntie is that she is super generous. Way too generous. She gave me RM50 as my duit Raya. I'm not so greedy-lah, I don't shamelessly tell people "It's my birthday today, give me extra money please". I am not so forward =/

Then we had dinner in Victoria Station in Medan Damansara. Every year my brother plans on calling the staff to sing 'Happy Birthday' to me (if you tell them it's your birthday, they sing for you), but it never materialises (because I don't fancy the idea of some random person singing happy birthday to me...unless of course, he is THE one and only David Cook).

I had fun, it may not have been a great birthday but I had fun regardless.

Anyways, let's take a look at the gifts and cards then, shall we?

This is what I got from my parents.


Say hello to Andy, my new iPod nano. So darn pretty, kan?

I'm not allowed to use him until the 18th because that when my exams will be over and done with.




This is the card the family gave me. Yes, my brother and his wife signed this card too. I'm their daughter too, apparently. Does anyone else think that my brother's signature looks like it says David instead of Rizal?

Aimee Lee Kit-Ee/woman with so many 'eees' in her name sent me a card. Next time, you use eagles, okay? Pos Malaysia fails us again.


Aimee ah, I showed my dad your card like you asked me to and he says he likes your handwriting better.
-.-' He says mine is all disjointed, something about it not being connected or written in cursive handwriting. I like my handwriting, okay, thank you.

This pretty box came from the mate. Randomly, I didn't know how to open the box and Yas said to pull the lid up and that's when we found out how to open the box. I am so stupid, I tell you.

What's inside, you ask?

No-lah, how can you fit David Cook inside there? You people are too imaginative-lah. So much free time, is it? Come do my assignment for me, please?

I squealed when I saw these things inside that pretty box.

Chelsea pencil box.

Chelsea mug. I so happy can die, thank you.
Thank you, mate! *hugs and squeezes you*

Skizzy, upon hearing the bad start to my day, found something that she knew would cheer me up.

"For you, on your 21st...you deserve this because you have to wait another 42 days for the album"

THIS = ONE DROOL-WORTHY BIRTHDAY PRESENT EVER.

The revelation of THAT particular tattoo leaves me oh-so very happy I'm doing cartwheels now.

Oral fixation, much?

MY BOYFRIEND IS MY MUSE! HAHAHA! Thank God for that Guitar Hero advert.

Favourite photo ever.

I have come to a conclusion that this man is a robot manufactured by an evil scientist to render people speechless and seduce innocent beings into having horrible, horrible thoughts.

Yes, you have succeeded in seducing me, now quit the smirking already! Let me enjoy the remaining bit of dignity I have left in myself. Don't taunt me!

I love you, woman. I did get him on my birthday after all. HAHA!

Thank you so much everyone for the gifts and wishes through Facebook, Friendster, MySpace, online, LiveJournal, text messages, snail mail and e-mails. I love you all sempiternally. Here's to more birthdays and happy occasions.

Right, I'm exhausted and my double whammy of aches isn't getting any better so I better go to bed.

Sing it with me.

Dear Dang Sylvien @ mate,

I hope you haven't melted after seeing Michael Phelps' abs of steel.

Where are you? Why are you hiding from me? Are you secretly posting up that ugly gayboy's poster you took down recently and not telling me?


No longer convinced my house is possessed,
-me-

*****

So yes, I know I was being paranoid. My house is not possessed.

Are you happy I confessed to being paranoid already?

We should throw a party.

*****

Has the world not seen enough of Miley Cyrus or the Jonas Brothers?

I feel like turning my TV and radio off when I hear all their songs. Maybe it's just me.

I was practising my guitar yesterday and this old Westlife song was being played on the radio. It made me cringe thinking "I used to listen to this and love the music they make, oh my God". I must add that I still remember the words to that cheesy song. Shameful but true. And I hate it when I go to Parkson in OneU, they play the same Westlife album over and over again. I mean, isn't there another CD they can pop in? I'd be shaking my head everytime I go there and my mother knows all too well.
"I'm not asking them to play the other half of you-know-what-I-call-them. Just play something different"

Maybe if I was 10 or something, I'd believe that the world revolved around Miley Cyrus, High School Musical and the Jonas Brothers and idolise them sempiternally. But sadly, I am not 10, but 20 and horribly old.

I guess we just go through a phase in life where we get exposed to different kinds of music. I like the different genres of music except maybe a bit of techno and Japanese music. I find the resurgence of old boybands highly amusing too. Take That is fine because eventhough their music sounds very, very morose, I can tolerate that.

Do we still get to call them boybands since they are old in their mid-30s and they are no longer considered as boys?
Then again, manband would sound very odd.

We all go through a phase where we experiment the different kinds of music there are out there. I listened to rap when I was 13, then I started listening to rock music when I was sixteen or so (rock became a huge part in my life when I turned 18), but pop played a major part of my life because I grew up with that music (Michael Jackson was one, he was after all, the King of Pop).

If you asked me now how much of pop music I listen to, I'd tell you that it's a very limited playlist when it comes to pop. Well, maybe it's because all my pop songs are stashed in my dead PC. Haha.

But still, I cannot take it when all I hear on the radio are these artistes that come out from the Disney Channel. I don't like the Jonas Brothers because they made a remake of this song I liked called Year 3000 from Busted (I blame May for all the Brit music influences in my life). The original song itself is hilarious, but then they changed it and I didn't quite like their version.

Yes, I realise I am rambling so I might as well shut up.

*****

Say what you want about Magic Rainbow, but the more I hear it, the more I like it. Contrary to what Skizzy said earlier in one post about my hating the song, I like the song a lot more than I used to, it's sort of grown on me.

Go on and make fun of me. I dare you.

*****

My mother is so amusing it makes me cry thinking about next year or the year after that.

I know she'll come with me (she wants to stalk old grumpy frumpy Fergie) and all, but still. The thought of leaving home does scare me.

Almost everyday, she will come and ask me "Do you have a boyfriend?" and everytime I say no, she says "You will tell me when you have one, right?".

One day, while waiting for her to pick me up, I was just talking to a guy friend of mine who was also waiting for his parents. Almost two hours after we came home, she came into my room and asked me "That guy you were talking to just now...is he your boyfriend?".

-.-' Every guy I talk to now is my boyfriend-lah, is it?

"No, he's a guy who is my friend whom I see as an older brother. That's it. Ma, don't worry, if I do have a boyfriend, which will be very much later in life, I will tell you first, okay? And I will bring him home to meet the both of you instead of having a shotgun wedding"

She laughed and nodded. She knows my take on my brother's wedding so it's all good.

But she does not think my boyfriend is sexy (this came after a long and lengthy conversation about Avril's concert being postponed or cancelled or whatever that's going to happen to it, and what would happen if the said boyfriend wanted to come here).

How dare she say that. Hmmph. Boo her.


And today she was surprised that my phone bill was less than hers. Mine went down by a whole 50%.
"How can that happen? It's a miracle. What did you do?"

Just got to love her.


I need to get back on my guitar now. Toodles.

From here, it will only get worse.

You know what?
True friends stab you from the front, not from the back.

*****

My brother just came in and asked me about the friendly match.

The fucking audacity of him to ask me that.

I'M THE GODDAMN LAST PERSON YOU SHOULD ASK!

*breathes deeply*

Seriously. Stop pissing me off and making me sad.

*****

Why was I being so bitter the past two weeks?

01. On Saturday, someone sent me a message saying if I wanted tickets to watch the match and he could organise a meeting with the boys. I so badly wanted to say yes, I almost cried.


02. I don't hate my future sister-in-law. I really don't.
It's just his decision to get married that pisses me off. He just conveniently tells my mother in the car on the way to a wedding which my father and I didn't attend one day that "I'm seeing someone and I would like to get married". Like seriously? If I hadn't known any better, I'd say it's like a shotgun wedding. It would be nice if he actually brought her home to introduce us all to her. I have a hard time adjusting to new situations. I'm awkward, to be honest. My parents at least can deal with changes better. Not that I'm saying I can't, I can. It's just that the process itself is longer than what a normal person would undergo.

I can't talk to her. I barely know her! I know, once she lives here, I'll get used to it, you say. But the thing is, we're on two different polarities. She's quiet, sane and religious; a few things I am not known for. Most people know I have an innate fear of talking to people who talk very softly. Well, yeah, she talks softly and that doesn't help me at all.

I want to be familiar with someone before I let them be a part of my life.
"I know you don't hate her. It's just that, you need to know someone for you to trust them. Trust is an important issue with you"

How he manages to tap my inner thoughts like that amazes me slightly.
"How do you know it's exactly that?"
"Trust me, I've been your best friend for 7 years and dated you for two. I know you even more than YOU let on"
"Besides...I can see it in your eyes, I can see it in your smile..."

Stupid fellow. We're having a serious conversation and you randomly sing Lionel Richie's Hello to me.

I don't hate her. I promise. This feeling shall pass, I know of it.


03. This wedding plans are robbing me of my social life. It's sad to say I have yet to watch The Dark Knight when three-quarter of the population of the world have already watched it TWICE.

Fine, I'm being a fat, selfish walrus.


04. One of my father's late friend's daughter is going off to Cyberjaya to study and we decided to visit her on Saturday. We went out for dinner/supper (I have been skipping breakfast and dinner because I just have no mood to eat) and then we went back to their place. We got on to talking and somehow the conversation went to the topic of consuming fish.
"Fish is food for the brain. You're smart. See when you ate fish, you got 7As for your PMR. Even my son also got good result. My son...and my daughter too"

The statement itself is innocent, but I tend to look at it in both a positive and negative light.

Yes, dear father. I am not smart. No need to feel sorry for me. There is no need for you to feel compelled to mention my being smart. It's okay. I've learnt I am second best. Silver is such a pretty colour on me compared to gold.

The next day, I just went to the trophy cabinet and took out all of my stupid trophies and hid them somewhere in my room.

It's not because of what my father said. Almost every trophy in there belongs to my brother. To put my trophies there would be an insult to his intelligence.

Everyone who steps into my house for the first time would casually walk over to the cabinet and peruse the trophies one by one.
"Eh, why mostly your son's trophies only?"

We live in a culture that tells us the amount of As we score is equivalent to how perfect we are and how wonderful life is.

I don't want to be subjected to people's idiocy to such things.

So if and should anyone ask me why I lack trophies in the cabinet, I might just answer "Why? Do you want to give me one so that I don't feel sorry for myself for not being as smart as he is?"

At least I know how to spell and count and read. That's all that matters, no?

*****

ROBBIE KEANE IS IN LIVERPOOL.

WHAT THE HELL.

HE'S NOT MEANT TO BE THERE. HE BELONGS TO SPURS.

Ah well, not like the went to ManUre. Ugh, that would've been disastrous.

*****

I promise not to buy anything until October.

Whatever money comes my way shall be used for the David Cook album fund, the David Cook in KL fund, and the ongoing Stamford Bridge fund.

=)

*****

"Ma, I don't care. When David Cook comes to KL, I am going"
"Must see the timing is right or not first-lah"
"Timing right or not, I am going. I have already been robbed of so many things, let me have this moment, okay"
"I'm taking you with me, by the way"


I feel better already.


Stop worrying, okay. Michael Johns is keeping me happy with his shenanigans.


Currently listening to:
Warwick Avenue - Duffy.

You think you're loving but you don't love me.

I fail in being a woman. MISERABLY.

So yeah, finding a suitable handbag was such a daunting task I nearly had an argument with my father.

Do I sound like I'm joking?

I mean, half the bags I saw were either too auntie-ish, too expensive, or too ugly.

I found one that was decent and functional. It was RM250. Trust me, I don't like the price of it, but I had no choice.


Then my mother wanted to buy herself a new lipstick. Guess what uncle asked me?
"You want lipstick also or not?"
"No"
"Sure or not?"
"Yeah"
*asks the mother*
"You think she needs lipstick?"
"I think so, don't want her looking pale in Seremban"

So yes, this woman who hardly uses make-up actually bought lipstick and eyeliner from M.A.C. because she didn't want to look pale.

*while applying the lipstick tester*
"I officially fail in being a woman"

The staff there probably thinks I live under a rock for not knowing how to apply lipstick properly.

Yes, I bought a jewellery set that had only one crystal stud. I like it very much.


Don't you just love the principle of parsimony?

And yes, I officially fail in being a woman because I don't wear make-up to save my life, I hate massive handbags and I hate too much spakly jewellery.

*****

I had a fruitful trip today. Everything is (almost) done.

18 days to go. I can't for everything to end.

I'm so tired. Will talk more tomorrow.

Someday I'll be on top, high above you all.

Short update to say a few things.

01. I was crying non-stop the whole of yesterday. It wasn't pretty, I was switching from crying to being a grumpy cow with people. To make matters worse, listening to Michael Johns made me cry. I mean I was crying to David's takes on Always Be My Baby and I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing and I'm used to it already, but honestly. Crying to Michael Johns? Good lord, that was strange. A few things that transpired between my mother and I caused this rather weird irrigation system in my eyes. Will only talk about it if asked by people I consider close enough to let them in on this issue.


02. I have been eyeing this diamond necklace worth RM398 I saw in Bangsar Village 2 for the last one month. On Friday, I was rather excited about the necklace so I joked with my mother saying that she'll buy it for me. Yesterday, we got to the shop and asked the staff to take the LAST necklace (they only had five of it) and my parents asked me if I wanted it. Guess what I said?

I said NO.

They were taken aback and told me to reconsider.

I told them "Okay fine, let me go into the shoe shop next door to prevent myself from being influenced by other things here".

I did that and started texting my 17 years.
"So I'm at the shop and they're getting me the necklace I was bitching to you about"
"And you're getting it? Yay you!"
"I said NO"
"The fuck did you do that for woman?"
"I just realised I don't need it anymore"
"Is it because you feel like you're costing your parents money on this when they're spending a lot for the wedding?"
"No, you know they wouldn't mind about that. How do you think I got the white gold ring I wear lately?"
"It's because of what your mother said, right? That's got to be why you fucking said no to a necklace worth that much!"
"Yes...no...maybe. I don't know. Partly, I guess"
"So you're saying no?"
"Yes, I'm saying I don't want it"
"Jesus, woman. You've been holding out for a month for that elusive thing and now when someone wants to get it for you, you're saying no?"
"Yes"
"Damn, bless your husband with utter patience and strength to handle you. It's amazing how I am able to stand your madness for 17 years"
"You love me, that's why"
"Talk to you later, sweets. Yau char kuay later?"
"You bet"

I went back into the shop and told my parents and the staff there very bravely:
"It's okay. I don't want it. I'm sure of it, so don't ask me again"

So yeah, I said no to something I had my eyes on for one month. You must be thinking I am crazy. Or smart. Or both.


03. I had no idea that David Cook's camera face began from the Top 24. You know, the time where he had that hair I hated to bits because it was long and too god-damn straight? It's amazing to see that progression. Like what mate said once about his hair: "From rocker hair to 'ah beng' hair to gentleman's hair". Hahaha! Seriously, go watch his performance of Happy Together in YouTube and compare it with uh...say...Always Be My Baby or The World I Know. You will understand our views on his 'ah beng' hair.


04. Oh my god. Gordon Ramsay was at the British GP and he supports McLaren! OMG HE SUPPORTS BOTH MY TEAMS! HE SUPPORTS CHELSEA AND MCLAREN MERCEDES!

I squealed when I saw him in front of my dad. That was amusing albeit a little embarrassing. Hello, squealing at a man who is like forty-something in front of your father is strange. EXTREMELY.


05. Lewis won on home soil! OMG I was so happy for him and I nearly cried seeing the elation etched on his pretty face. It reminded me of the day David won. The tears were there and seeing them speak after being on such a high and having the time of their lives (pun intentionally intended) made me want to hug my TV screen and not let go.


06. And Felipe Massa almost killed a rabbit off the track! As did Lewis. Have mercy on those poor bunnies! But you have to admit, it was quite amusing to see the rabbits running off the grassy side of the track when the cars came swerving at them.


07. I learnt that when you're upset, the best song to make you smile when you're unhappy is "Hungry Like The Wolf". You know which version. Haha.


08. Exams begin tomorrow. Wish me luck!

I will be away and probably not going to update until next Monday, which is when my last paper is over.

In case you miss me, which is highly unlikely, go listen to lots of Paolo Nutini, David Cook, Axium, MidWest Kings and Michael Johns. And whatever you know I listen to.

OR...GO WATCH THIS.
PAY SPECIAL ATTENTION AT 1:30 ONWARDS.

Oh, you know what I'm thinking.


And to think I said this was a short update. Pfft.

Straddle the line, in discord and rhyme

Warning: This post contains profanities and excessive rants about stupid people. If you are under 17 and feel queasy about profanities, you know what button to click.

If there is one thing I cannot stand currently, it would be wolf-whistling.

Or cat calls. Or anything that is equivalent.

Why does it annoy the hell out of me?
Because I find it absolutely offensive and rude.

See, if you want to call someone (especially me), DO NOT FUCKING WHISTLE.

My mother gave me a name so use it please. Even if you pronounce my name wrongly, I will not hate you.

Say you don't know my name, call me 'Miss'. Not 'kakak' okay? I will kick you.

BUT FOR GOD'S SAKE, DO NOT WHISTLE/TAP THE TABLE/SNAP YOUR FINGERS WHEN YOU ARE CALLING ME!

I cannot stand it. Even when my mother taps her fingers on the table to call me, I start ranting like a mad woman.

The rudest thing I've ever seen is when someone starts snapping their fingers when they want to get their attention. Oi, don't you think those people deserve some amount of respect? You treat them like dirt and they might be less than hospitable with you. Trust me, the horrors of knowing people who work in the food industry and the things they do when they have customers from hell is one good reason to be nice to them.


And you know how when a guy sees a girl and he starts whistling at her?

DO NOT EVER FUCKING DO THAT TO ME.

I will give you the finger. No joke.

I was walking back to college after buying a drink when this van passes me by and the driver looks out of the window and looked at me with a smug grin across his face.

And then he stops.

I had a half a mind to turn around and use the other route back to college.

But I walked on. I have a right to take that route and that sad story of a man can't stop me.

Guess what the fucker did?

He whistled at me.

I ignored him and he kept on doing it.

Middle fingers, as if on cue, comes alive and stays upright.

Excuse me, I find it so degrading when a man does that.

What am I, a piece of meat? An object of your lust? Not a person with some degree of dignity?

Didn't your mother teach you manners? You're such a disappointment and disgrace to your family, you know?

I am no juicy piece of meat (woman, if you value your life, it's best if you kept your lips sealed). So when you ogle and whistle at me, it makes me feel embarrassed and stripped of any kind of dignity I have in me.

So don't ever whistle at me unless you want the finger.

*****

My mother is too funny.

"Wake up!"
"I'm up already"
"Germany beat Turkey 3-2"
"I know...Sylvien texted me"
"Oh she did?"
"Yeah, and she always feels like she's talking to a wall when she's watching the match and I'm fast asleep. I feel like a bad friend"
"Haha"
"You know Turkey played really well, they should be proud"
"You know what Sylvien said about the match?"
"No. What?"
"She said there was a blackout in the stadium"
"Really?"
"Yeah"
"It's such a shame that they weren't wearing glow-in-the-dark jerseys like the Chelsea ones. They could pass to one another and trick the opponents"
*dies laughing on the bed*
"Why are you laughing? I'm being serious, okay?"

And you wonder why I am quite random.

*****

I think I am going to have a fever.

No, no. Not Cookie fever-lah. I may be madly in love with the man, but I don't think the Cookie fever has continued past May 21st.

I have a flu right now. I've been sneezing non-stop the whole day.

Magic rainbows don't help cure the flu, do they?

Make me fall for you, as if I had nothing else to do.

I'm listening to Back For Good and you were the first person I thought about.
You and your random car-slut jokes.

=)

*****

Have I told you that my friends are so random, they make my stomach hurt from too much laughing?

They're such funny people, I love them.

*****

I went to BookXcess for the first time and I acted like a kid in the candy store. OMG that place is like book heaven!

I tell you, not many people find joy in a good book.

Or random things like "Loving cougars is not a crime". Hahaha!

*****

How do you justify your reasons of respecting someone?

I mean, wouldn't it seem trite to list all the qualities you find admirable in a person you have great respect for?

Note that respect and liking could be two different things. You could like someone for who they are and respect them, and you could respect someone without liking them.

*****

Oh yes, never ever insult my Chelsea boys and criticise my judgments.

You don't tell me that Petr Cech is clumsy and call Edwin van der Sar awesome and top form.

I have half a mind to say "Eh you said he's on top form but Holland's out? How then?" but no, my mother taught me right and told me not to stoop that low.

And also I like those Dutch boys.

YOU have no right to make fun of my Slaven Bilic okay? He is ten thousand kinds of awesome that you will never be.

Oh and my underdog team, Turkey is in the semi-finals. HAH!

Hell hath no fury like a Chelsea fan scorned. You ought to know that by now.

*****

I make more sense when I have a headache and when I'm horribly cranky.

*****

If ever I ask you if I should cut my hair, kick me. Hard.

*hugs*
"Are you smelling my hair?"
"Yup"
"Oh"
"Promise you won't cut it short"
"Why?"
"Your hair frames your face perfectly and I just love seeing the way it covers your face when you're asleep"

Bugger, don't be a stalker-lah? Scary.

"And you look like a panda"

How nice of you to actually notice my eyebags.
Idiot.

*****

I finally get to curl up in bed comfortably.

Thank God for the miracles that are 2PM classes on Thursdays.

Sex is sex, and love is love.

If I could do just about anything right now, I want to stab Cookie's boots and hear them scream in pain.

Yes, I have a full-hate relationship with pointy shoes. Ugly.

*****

I went 31 hours without sleep.
Yeah, I broke my own record. How awesome is that?

Had a wonderful 6 and a half hour's worth of sleep. Pure bliss.

UNTIL MY MOTHER WOKE ME UP TO SAY "PA SAYS TO GET UP AND EAT".

Pfft. I told her that if I don't wake up past 9PM, don't wake me up at all.

But no.

"I told auntie to come at 9 thinking you all would eat dinner at 8:30"
"I told ma that if I sleep beyond 9, don't wake me up for dinner"
"You don't want to eat?"
"I want to sleep!"

My father thinks that if I skip ANY meals or do not drink fruit juices after meals, I will die of malnutrition.

-.-'

Great. Now my sleep cycle is going to be horribly wonky.



Not much to talk about. Proper update when I am feeling less tired.
*yawns*

I'm not crazy.

If I die within the next few days, it's because I am surrounded by extremely inconsiderate people.

I need a dose of Magic Rainbow now.

Badly.


I WANT THIS WEEK TO END ALREADY!



Just in case I die over the course of the period of madness which is this week, I want you to remember me as the one who would never shut up about David 'sempiternally immaculate' Cook.

Heaven help us all.

I will not stand in your way.

The last few days have been insane!

On Wednesday, I think I saw a dead body. I was in the car on the way home when I see a group of people on the side of the road looking rather anxious. I saw a silhouette of a man underneath an umbrella. I thought it was a worker taking a nap (since there was some construction work going on). I took a closer look from the car window, it was actually a man lying motionless, his eyes were wide open and not moving or blinking, and his mouth was dripping with blood. That just scared the living daylights out of me.


Thursday...what happened on Thursday? Oh yeah, Luiz Felipe Scolari was announced as the new Chelsea manager. There was no water in my housing area. Lucky for me, I could take a bath that morning. I had my quiz and came home and decided to dye my hair. Yes, we shall talk about that later. Then, as I was watching all the colour cascade down the sink, I put on the conditioner. And that's when the water begins to run out.

*water drips slowly*
*water supply dies*
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

Like, really. Worst thing to ever happen when you're washing your hair.

So I ran from the master bedroom's bathroom to the other bathroom upstairs.

*water dies after 5 seconds*
"OHMYGOD NOT AGAIN!!!"

So I run to my room and throw on some clothes, while complaining to mate online (who somehow thought it was funny that I was complaining to her while I still have conditioner in my hair).

I ran to the bathroom downstairs, hoping that there would be some water. The shower had no water. But there was water coming out from the side tap. I spent like a good 30 minutes under the tap, trying to get my hair conditioner-free.

I have never seen my towel soaking wet before.

I watched the Croatia-Germany match with my dad and it was hilarious.
"I want Croatia to win"
"Cannot, they made England lose out*! Even though I think the manager is very handsome, you cannot support them"
"It's not a matter of whether I think the manager is handsome or not, it's about rooting for the underdogs!"

*I only said it because he usually is quite bitter about teams that beat England. I am not so bitter. My bitterness tastes strongest when I see Portugal.

And this was just funny.
*sees German manager*
"Eh that's Jose ah?"
*stares blankly*
"No-lah! That's the German manager, his name is Joachim Loew"
"Oh, looks very young"
"Yeah"
"He looks like he's under thirty. He looks good and dresses well"

Hahaha!

My mother was mean. She called my TV boyfriend a "small-time rocker".
"Your DC is a small-time rocker, not like Bo or Daughtry!"
"How dare you insult my TV boyfriend?"
"I am not talking to you! Hmmph, insult my boyfriend. HAH!"

Jealous, much?


Today, I had to go out to make some clothes, buy some stuff and get my keloid-shrinking jab. The last plan failed to materialise, because the doctor's office was closed. Apparently, some people *cough* my father *cough* forgot to check his operating hours on Fridays.

*going up the stairs to hell the doctor's office*
"Okay, there is no chance of me running down, because I'm in the middle of you two and you'd catch me if I try to escape"

Yeah, yeah. Pansy.

I saw a couple of skinny ties, but they were being sold at RM29.90 each! WTF. I need two.
Ugh, someone take me out to The Tie Shop now!


I am so tired. I need sleep. Tomorrow is going to be as taxing as today. I'll be out in my second home and the area surrounding it in the morning and I have a 21st birthday party to attend at night.

Viva la Espana! Go Oranje!


I have a confession, by the way.

I have a crush on this man.

His name is Slaven Bilic. He is the manager of the Croatian football team, a rockstar, has his own band called Rawbau, plays guitar, has a law degree; all of which make him almost incredibly endearing.

Why almost?

Bugger smokes-lah. WTF.

But he is ten kinds of awesome.

Go watch this video of their song for Croatia for the EURO 2008 campaign, Vatreno Ludilo.


No, I have not betrayed my TV boyfriend (you do realise he is called TV boyfriend for a reason, right?).

I'm just trying not to bore you to death about him because the majority of the people who read this dislike him.

On another random but related note to the picture above, I heard the studio version on the radio and I started squealing because I didn't expect to hear THAT song on the radio! Everyone and their cats know I love that version.

That just made my night.

Little things make me happy.

I ain't missing not a single thing.

I chickened out of today's keloid injection.

Not sure if you would consider fatigue as a valid reason to skip the injection.

Bloody pansy. Go marry that pansy gayboy-lah!

I've taken these jabs 4 times already and yet I still fear them.


Why in the name of the good cows are we so vain?


I need sleep and logic.

I need to study.


I'm taking a break from this for a while. So many things going on, such short time to talk about them all.

Edited [12.06.2008; 9:40AM]:
You know your brain has been eaten up when you watch the Portugal-Czech Republic match and yell:

"RICCY! WHY DIDN'T YOU PROTECT THE GOAL FOR PETR?"

I am officially the most retarded person on Earth.

Sigh, Petr. I love you no matter what people say (Clumsy? HAH!). I love Riccy and Paulo too.

I miss Tomas Rosicky. The Czech boys really miss their captain =(

My brain cells are dying faster than it's supposed to.


Edited [12.06.2008; 11:59AM]:
Luiz Felipe Scolari is the new Chelsea manager.

Oh well. Not really concerned, should be a good choice, albeit I dislike him quite a bit.

29th July. That is all.


And I have no water to bathe because the pipe near my housing area burst into a gugillion pieces.

Damn it.

There is no four leaf clover, try again.

Today was fucking awful.

Yes, be surprised. I swore.

I don't want to talk about it.

I am skipping dinner because I am not a happy camper.

The low blood pressure symptoms are back. Oh joy.

I cried too much in one day. I had a breakdown. Wah, I sound human for once-lah kan?
*roll eyes*


Listening to this song just hit me. I never paid much attention to it, it wasn't one of my favourite songs.

But today, I realised how this song is exactly the summary of my fucking feelings today.

Hold - Axium
Takes a number, stands in line
'cause he doesn't feel like himself
And he's always played the wallflower
just cared for a sense of self
He plays on in spite of everything
disillusioned by his right
What makes it all go away
when you can't put up a fight, can't put up a fight?

Oh, but it's okay to breathe
your worries away
when everything and everyone try to lead you astray
Hold your own, hold your ground,
hold to life when you're down,
and always believe that there's a way back home

She's waiting on the answer,
a way to let them know
The thought of someone else inside her,
and the fear begins to grow
Warm tears feed dry hands
as she falls to the ground
It's strange how sadness presents itself
when there's no one around,
there's no one around

Oh, but it's okay to breathe
your worries away
when everything and everyone try to lead you astray
Hold your own, hold your ground,
hold to life when you're down,
and always believe that there's a way back home.


Judge me all you want. But you want to know something?
We're all fucking actors in a play on a stage.

Don't you dare think you are higher than me because between you and me, there's not much of a difference really.

We are all innocent.

Now don't you wait or hesitate.

I am complaining a lot about rather random things of late.

TM's latest advert is the recent thing that sort of pisses me off.

It shows a man orchestrating a crowd to chant loudly for their favourite teams for EURO 2008. I can't remember the campaign.

Now really? What happened to supporting your local team?

Are we really going to glorify ANOTHER COUNTRY'S TEAM INSTEAD OF OUR OWN?

Of all the people, you'd least expect people like TM to actually advocate these things.

Yes, I know. Our national team is nothing to be shouted and glorified about, but still.

DECLARE YOUR LOYALTY FOR ANOTHER COUNTRY?

I may sound like a hypocrite to you.
Hey, for your information, I do actually support Selangor, okay.
No matter how screwed up our country's football is, I do still have my loyalty to that team.

I better stop now. The powers that be in TM actually hates me. My parents have been complaining and writing letters to some government body about TM's services and they have been calling TM like EVERYDAY about my faulty phone service AND screwed up Internet services.

Buggers got time to ask people to declare their loyalty for other countries' football teams but NOT to look into people's complaints.

I hereby declare my loyalty to my PASAR RANGERS.

*****

Is it possible to hate someone you love so much with a burning passion?

*****

Oh and I salute her. Big time.

Her collection and devotion leaves me in awe.

*bows down to her*


She may be crazy. But I adore her.

*****

This is hilarious.

"You know what? I went to church with my family the other day and my sister sat next to me, my mother and my grandmother"
"Then while the pastor was giving the sermon, she says 'Oh goodness, you know how DC holds the microphone right? If he holds and caresses it like that, he would do the same to his lover too!'. My grandmother looked at us and said 'Hush, child, we're in church!'. I wanted to laugh out loud but I was too embarrassed"
"HAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"I felt so horrible. I mean you're in a place of worship which is supposed to be holy and all, and she feeds you filthy thoughts, how would you react?"
"I can actually see you blushing at the thought"
"I KNOW, OKAY? You know what my mother said?"
"What did Auntie Sheen say?"
"HELL YEAH!"
"She said hell in church?"
"YES!"
"I love your family, you know?"
"You'd love my grandmother for what she said after we came home from church"
"This is going to be good"
"Honey, I heard his version of Music of the Night, and I have to tell you, I've never felt so caressed and touched like this before"
O.O
"She said that in front of my grandfather okay? OMG I couldn't take the madness anymore"
"Your grandmother's a cougar"
"Sad but true"
"Your grandmother is my favourite person of all-time right now"
"At the rate I'm going, I am going to turn into a cougar too"
"Hahaha! Cougar May, reporting for duty!"
"Shut up"



For my cougar-in-training, just because I love to torment you. Haha.


Currently listening to:
Magic Rainbow Time of My Life - David Cook.

OMFG MAGIC RAINBOW! HAHAHAHAHAHA!