And I say that you're just fine.

I was up at 5 for sahur. Yes, my sleeping time has gone absolutely wonky. Very horrible.

And I decided to watch Channel 711 (the things ASTRO do to make me die faster). They had the Ellen show.

And there was this 11-year-old girl who can hypnotise lizards and put them in outfits/poses.

All she did was just rub the lizard's belly and it would be hypnotised for at the most 30 minutes.

Seriously, a cicak whisperer?

*****

Today, my crazy Filipino lecturer (I have valid reasons to call him crazy) was talking bout some interesting facts he found out from a survey done by FHM.

**Warning: The results of the survey were not tabulated by me, it's just what I heard today in class. This post may contain pictures that are either suitable or not suitable for little children. I am merely doing this to entertain myself because I am tired and grumpy**

Apparently, males with the healthiest bodies come from Holland because they ride bicycles more than they drive.

Hmmm...let's see if this is true shall we?

Exhibit A:

*imagines him on a bicycle*
*starts sobbing for stupid reasons*

Errm...let's proceed to our next male specimen.

Exhibit B:

Lies! Lies! I protest!!! He drives!


Anyways, according to the survey, males from Italy have the worst bodies.

Honestly, this cannot be true.

How can ANYONE in the right frame of mind say they don't have the fittest body?! The hotness in Fabio Cannavaro won't be happy. No, not even Zambrotta or Pirlo.


Next...the Portuguese were the considered as the most nutritionally-adequate ones (okay, I am not remembering the whole categories because the class was at 9 in the morning...a 12-hour lapse doesn't help) because they eat fresh vegetables.

Exhibit A-D: Hmmm...okay. Makes sense.


Exhibit E: Makes perfect sense to me. Seriously.


Exhibit F: Oh yes, makes perfect sense, especially if spotted with exhibit E.


Exhibit G: Makes no sense. The pic is only here for the mate who tolerates my nonsense.


We move on to the Spaniards. Apparently, the Spanish boys are more stressed because they're religious.

Exhibit A: I guessed he's stressed.


Exhibit B: I think he's stressed, that's why he didn't score on Saturday.


Oh...apparently the Dutch boys are the ones who have more extra-marital affairs.

Hmm...this pic proves nothing. It's just here because I didn't know which other pic to put up.


Lastly, the Portuguese men have the most sex in a week.

Now we know the story with him and the escorts.


Moral of the story: Don't believe everything you read about surveys. Unless it's from a credible source, of course. Therefore, I strongly suggest for all of you to wait until I come up with my own reliable survey.

*****

I was about to fall asleep in class, when the lecturer decided to call my name loudly so that I can answer a question.

At times like this, I rue the fact that he knows the father and the brother.

I Am NOT ever going to plan to fall asleep in class again.