Make it up as you go along.

Hello world. I haven't run off to Timbuktu or Bali and married someone.

I was resting. I have been online but just too tired to update or even make a short recap of the wedding on Sunday.

The point is, I am here now, after constant pestering by my pole-dancing Scouser, ready to give you a recap of the things that transpired on Sunday.


We all went to bed at 2AM that Sunday morning, all of us were supposed to wake up at 6, since we were leaving home at 8.

Guess who brilliantly turned off the alarm once it rang at 6, only to wake up at 7:15?
(no cookies shall be given if you guessed it right, just a pat on the head)

So yours truly ran out to the bathroom and bathed like it was her last bath and her life depended on it (which was actually the truth).

I put on make-up without looking like a drag queen. I was rather surprised that I looked somewhat decent in make-up.

As you can see, I put on very minimal make-up, I didn't want to end up looking like someone smashed a cake in my face.

I felt very left out when I saw my family donning blue outfits and I was in a green one. Oh well, I like sticking out like a sore thumb. It's what I do best.

But the outfit was so loose, it almost fell off. Don't tell me I lost so much weight in the span of three weeks okay? Freaking impossible.

So, eventually we left at 8:30AM because part of our entourage to Seremban were delayed by the MRR2 problem. On the way to Seremban, it rained. It was raining on my brother's wedding day.

So I grumbled to Mr. 12AM pillow talks about it and he said "God's blessing the wedding, 'hujan rahmat' right?". He was right, I knew it, just that I didn't expect it to rain that much.

I texted my 17 years and asked if I'd see a magic rainbow later because of the rain.
"Woman, don't try to be funny with me"

We were escorted to another house so that my brother could change into a new set of clothes. After that, we went to the mosque for the nikah ceremony.

The imam asked my brother a lot of random questions, it kind of annoyed me. And you know what was worse? KIDS. There were kids running all over the place while I was trying to get decent shots of the ceremony. I almost gave them my death glare or hit them, but I decided against it because I didn't want to leave an infavourable impression on my in-laws.

Suddenly out of nowhere, this huge spider jumped onto my brother's lap, I actually jumped about too because I was scared. It was massive, not the size of a tarantula, but still!


He recited the 'lafaz nikah' in one breath, and they were pronounced husband and wife.






The newlyweds.

Then, my brother and his new wife sought blessings from all that were present including myself.


My father claimed he didn't cry. I believe him.



My mother and the newlyweds cried.
"Why are you crying?!"
"I'm happy"

If I'm happy, I laugh...and that's what I did.



New extension to the family =)



New family and the KL entourage. Perempuan Melayu terakhir, much?


After the ceremony in the mosque, my father, my brother and I went over to the other house for him to get dressed into his other outfit. I wanted to freshen up and see if my gayliner was smudged, and there was no mirror in the house. So I did the next best thing: take a picture of myself and see if there was anything wrong.

At that point I was being vain, my father walked into the room and caught me in the act. I had to explain myself and he understood. Out of curiosity, I asked him a question.
"Did you cry just now?"
"No, usually fathers don't cry when their sons get married, but they cry when their daughters get married"
"So say if I get married, will you cry?"
"Of course, I will!"

Aww...I feel loved. He loves me.

I told my parents not to cry at my wedding, I told them to laugh. They say I'm crazy. Pfft.


Then, we were whisked off to the bride's house for the next ceremony.

This is where I get to bless the couple on the dais. It was done quite haphazardly, the DJ called people to bless the couple in such a random order. He called me to bless the couple but at the same time called a few other people to bless them. I actually didn't want to do it because of the way the DJ was calling out the people to bless the couple.

But eventually, I did bless the couple. Again, it was just a matter of not trying to make a bad impression on the bride's side of the family.

I met an old schoolmate of mine who apparently works with my sister-in-law. Small world, eh?
"OMG HI!"
"HI! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?"
"THIS IS MY OFFICE MATE! WHY ARE YOU HERE?"
"THAT'S MY BROTHER!"
"OMG SMALL WORLD!"
"WE LIVE IN THE SAME AREA BUT OF ALL THE PLACES TO MEET?"
"FAR OFF RIGHT?"

I got a little excited seeing a familiar face besides my family, that's all.

We ate and talked, along the way, one of my dad's closest friend's daughter sang for the couple four times (because the DJ insisted she sang). During the second song, my cousin dared me to give her a flower, sort of like a groupie.


Of course, I obliged. Hey, who's going to provide you something to laugh about huh?

Then, the bride and groom started posing for the photographer. Goodness, did we have a laugh over the poses or what!

"Enough of the poses-lah, it's so ridiculous"


I think she wanted to say retarded but she didn't want to offend the photographer.


My niece asked me politely about when will I get married.
"When David Cook comes to KL and proposes to me"
"When I find the right person to get married to"

Sensible answer, right?

Great, now everyone wants to know when and who I am going to marry. My mother already has plans to use the recent hantaran boxes when it comes to my wedding and they've even covered my wedding car (but that itself requires a special entry of its own because the story is too funny).


Before we went back, we got lots of food to take back home; a goodie bag filled with bunga telur, potpourri, and other things; muffins; and God knows what else.

Oi, it was like Hari Raya Aidilfitri, my birthday, Deepavali and Christmas come early!

We had no space in our car to keep the things (what with the hantaran and all). We had to squeeze ourselves into the car.

My father is so hilarious. He went up on the dais and sat there holding the bouquet, and yelled "Oi, doesn't anyone want to take my picture?" and we all couldn't help but laugh and I told my mother to go up and sit next to him while I took the photo for them.

At least he remarried the same lady he got married to 29 years ago and not someone new.

My mother and brother hugged each other before we headed back home.
"Eh, don't cry ah. No drama and tears now"

More pictures HERE and HERE. Too lazy to upload them in my Photobucket account. If you have Facebook, go see the pictures there.

*****

My brother just got back home from Seremban (usually, the groom stays at the bride's place for a few days before their reception in the groom's place) and knocked on my door just to tell me he's home.

He saw some boxes of the hantaran in my room and saw a particular box and asked me what's in there.
"This is your wedding ring box. Here, you can keep it"
*panics and checks ring finger*
"Shit!"
"You left your ring?"
"I LEFT MY RING IN SEREMBAN!!!"
"You stupid idiot!"

God, that is quite fun, calling him an idiot.

You've been married for two days and you've forgotten the ring.

MAJOR EPIC FAIL, DEAR BROTHER OF MINE.


MAJOR.

EPIC.

FAIL.